The parody of being bipolar and being manic and not being able to sleep but desperately needing to sleep to not be manic
sleep is number 1!
So its currently 12:14am and I have been ‘winding down’ since 8pm trying to get my body ready for bed.
To begin - don’t worry because most importantly I have taken my medication.
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Yes, you can release that breath I know you’re holding.
I have done almost everything in the book including but not limited to:
only low lights/lamps since 6pm
big walk this morning at sunrise and at sunset to reset my circadian rhythm
time in nature
time with friends to debrief and unload the chaos of my life right now
took the day off work to rest and take the stress off my mind
had my medication + 2 melatonin tablets
sprayed the @kitbody pillow mist EVERYWHERE - thank you mum for the gorgeous present that has come in veryyyyy handy recently. at this rate she’ll be empty by the end of the weeek though :0
lit a calming incense
wore the comfiest pjs i have - cue mens boxers and mens oversized comfy harley davidson tee from 2020. yeah i know i’m giving teenage boy, it’s a VIBE TRUST ME xxxx
blew bubbles like a FREAK in the park to
1. calm my inner nervous system - blowing bubbles is essentially deep breathing but make it cauuuuute
2. heal my inner child - i have a lottt of childhood trauma coming up from the mania i am experiencing so blowing bubbles helps me connect and nurture little baby siena and give her what she would need
3. humble myself because sometimes it’s okay to be the freak at the local park blowing bubbles and you know what, haters gonna hate but real ones will see the vision or at least understand the vibes <3
had a sleeeeeepy tea with honey
facetimed my darling big sister who gave me lots of wisdom and advice - and thanks to her very sensible advice she has become my chief editor (to make sure i don’t hurt myself or anyone else with my sometimes aggressively passionate words and posting) !!!!!
put on my heavyyyy duty black out sleep mask - from amazon!
gave my feet, hands and body a stunning massage (if i do say so myself. and i do. but look its not my bff mikeys massage but it will do) with my new magnesium body lotion. thank u breaze and thank u local pharmacy <3
had a light dinner and big lunch
listened to calming music
wrote another substack article to unload my thoughts
TRYING to fall asleep in the spare room so i don’t become 1 jealous and 2 disregulated by jim sleeping like a BABY while i TOSS AND TURN FOR HOURS. ruuuuuuude jim. just kidding really glad one of us is getting sleep and honestly if anyone deserves a good sleep it’s you. me next though ok universe!!!! and anyone else get behind theres a freakin line !!!!
tried to tell myself that it’s okay that i’m manic right now and that this too will end but it might be today, or tomorrow or next month or next year and that’s okay. i have a big beautiful team of people, my partner, friends, family, coworkers, health professionals and more who are making sure i am safe, medicated and not putting myself or others in harms way
….
read the full article here: https://groundingmamma.substack.com/p/the-parody-of-being-bipolar-and-being?utm_source=profile&utm_medium=reader2